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You can probably tell from all the horror-themed content I've written for Blockbuster.co.uk that I'm addicted to fright flicks and all things scary. It's just the way I've always been. As soon as I learned to read I was down my local newsagent buying horror comics. At school, while most of the other boys wrote dull football stories for English class, mine were always about wars, disasters and monsters. I remember calling my cousin Ronald, four years my senior, for advice on how long it would take a person to bleed to death if they'd been thrown out of a tube train window. The moment I got my hands on my first VCR, however, back when I was about ten, was when my adventures really began: discovering horror classics old and new, watching the bloodiest death scenes over and over, and then in slow motion, and staying up late to watch the latest video nasty I'd managed to sneak into the house. I promise I'm not a psycho or anything. I'm just addicted to horror, and naturally enough, I love Halloween.
Back in the Seventies, in England, no one really celebrated Halloween. There might have been a few horror movies on the telly, if we were lucky, but there was certainly no trick or treating, and consequently I developed a deep, jealous resentment of all those lucky American kids who got to dress up, scare people and stuff their faces with candy. But times change, and Halloween's much more fashionable now. I've certainly done my bit to further the cause. For the past five years I've taken horror-themed pictures of my kids to send out as Halloween e-cards. When Maia was three weeks old, I dressed her as a witch, with a tiny broomstick and a wee black hat. The following year, I took a trick shot that made it look like Maia's head was sitting on a platter, surrounded by salad. By year three Phoebe was born, so I dressed her as the Devil and had Maia signing her soul away. Year four I got the most complaints about, a shot of a care bear bursting out of Phoebe's chest, Alien-style, and Maia's screaming face covered in blood. Last year I dressed Maia as the Scream killer and had her in the garden, menacing Phoebe through the window. And this year I've put together a little something about satanic sacrifice. Let me assure you, again, I am not a psycho.
Every year I take the girls trick or treating with a growing horde of friends. So many little witches. We carve pumpkins, eat pumpkin soup, watch The Simpsons Halloween specials and, of course, scoff cheap and nasty candy blagged from strangers. Later on, when the kids have worked through their sugar rushes and finally crashed, I settle down to watch a couple of my favourite scary movies. Usually something loud and bloody like Halloween or Friday The 13th Part 2. Then something creepy and unnerving like The Ring or The Exorcist. Then I go for something loud and bloody and creepy and unnerving such as John Carpenter's Prince of Darkness or George Romero's Dawn of the Dead. And if I have any energy left, I'll round off the night with something a bit lighter like Peter Jackson's Braindead or The Frighteners. And when I finally go to bed, and I'm a little nervous about turning off the light, I know I've had another perfect Halloween.
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Rounding things off with a couple of new releases, The Omen remake is a decent enough curiosity, while Hard Candy is a grueling thriller about a precocious 14-year-old girl ( Ellen Page) who teaches a suspected pedophile ( Patrick Wilson) a painful lesson that had my legs crossed tightly throughout. Do your list a favour, then, and add some scares.
Happy Halloween!
See you next week,
Marshall
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